What a well-named movie! Black holes in the real universe suck in all matter from which no light can escape. The Black Hole is a movie so bad that no appealing elements can escape. Hey, director Gary Nelson. You're not Kubrick. You'll never be Kubrick. You can't pull off the beautiful, confusing movie thing. The Buck Rogers TV show was more enjoyable than this piece of crap.

Backstory: Mrs. Zaius and I awake for a lazy Sunday. We stumble upon Turner Classic Movie channel and The Black Hole has just started. I thought: "How cool! I remember this movie from when I was a kid." I grabbed the remote and started recording it, just so we'd have it for more nostalgic fun later. I couldn't hit "delete" fast enough when it was over.

This movie sucks. SUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKSSS! Even though it has Anthony Perkins, Ernest Borgnine, Robert Forster (a great character-actor who plays Arthur Petrelli in "Heroes" and Max Cherry in "Jackie Brown.") and, of course, the great Austrian-born actor Maximilian Schell.

Oh, and Slim Pickens as the voice of the adorable "country" robot who works in the sanitation department. (No wonder he didn't take a credit for his voice work.)

And Roddy McDowell as "V.I.N.CENT." (Vital Information Necessary CENTralized) Ha! Clever!

Hey, Disney. That robot-buddy shtick was done already. Movie's called "Star Wars." Might have heard of it.

And why does the robot Maximilian kill Anthony Perkins with his "scary" twirling blades?

Why didn't his genius inventor — a man who trumped Einstein, a man who had unlocked the "mystery" of "the most powerful force in the universe", black holes — simply equip Maximilian with an instant death ray? Or something cool, like a piercing sound that makes Anthony Perkins' brain bleed out of his nose and ears? Oh, yeah. I remember now. The movie sucks! Anthony Perkins, by the way, did not have to die when he did — not if the plot was going to make any sense. And did Ernest Borgnine intentionally crash the good guys' escape rocket on purpose three seconds before they could have all jumped on board to help sabotage the evil genius? Or was he just a bad pilot. Won't ever know, thanks to the script-writers.

The music is good. Disney, Mrs. Z informs me, commissioned a symphony from John Barry to accompany the film. Really sets the mood. Unfortunately, the mood is ... "This Movie Sucks ... When Will It End!" So much initial nostalgic excitement, so little payoff.

I now await the wrath of no-life fan-boys. Merry Christmas.

Blogging is likely to be slow this week, since it is traditionally one of the slowest news weeks in Christendom. That, of course, means that some people will try to make hay out of things like Barack Obama golfing, but I'm way, way too serious for that kind of stuff. Which is why I'll spend the week doing (hopefully) fun stuff around here.

Today: The books that I enjoyed in 2008. These are not necessarily books that were written in 2008, but they are books I read this year. The list is weighted toward nonfiction, since that's where I spent most of my reading energies this year, but I love a good novel -- and would welcome your recommendations.

Anyway, my favorite five books that I read this year:

FORESKIN'S LAMENT: A MEMOIR, by Shalom Auslander: Throughout his memoir, “Foreskin’s Lament,” Auslander and God bicker, taunt and argue with each other. Auslander is trying to escape the suffocating orthodox Judaism of his youth, but God is always around to remind him that punishments large and small will be the results of his faithlessness.

Auslander is an amazing writer, painting a vivid, funny and bravely self-revealing picture of his battles with God. There are times, though, when you want to throttle him – not every bad thing in life is the result of some malicious planning by the universe. Stuff happens. But stuff doesn’t merely happen to Auslander, and in that he seems not rebellious but narcissistic; he reminds me of a Christian friend of mine who tearfully renounced his faith, permanently, when a German woman he liked didn’t reciprocate his adoration.

INFIDEL, by Ayaan Hirsi Ali: Speaking of the renunciation of faith...

You may have heard of Ali, who left her native Somalia -- and, eventually, the Muslim faith she'd been born into -- and eventually became a member of the Dutch parliament, speaking out forcefully against Islamic fundamentalism. Her outspokeness led to threats against her life and, eventually, a gig with the American Enterprise Institute. But don't hold that against her.

The image that lingers with me is the instrument that started Ali on her path away from a culture that oppressed and mutilated her (and women generally): Smutty Western romance novels. "Most of all, I think it was the novels that saved me from submission," she writes. "I was young, but the first tiny, meek beginnings of my rebellion had already clicked into place."

THE LIMITS OF POWER: THE END OF AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM, by Andrew Bacevich: Bacevich argues that America's consumerist culture -- which equates "freedom" with material comfort -- has become unsustainable financially, politically and militarily. It's a nice riposte against the Bush years, except that Bacevich (a conservative historian and former soldier) doesn't expect that President Obama will challenge Americans to make the sacrifices necessary to get back on track. This is a sobering (but slim) book that deserves to be taken seriously.

DAYDREAM BELIEVERS: HOW A FEW GRAND IDEAS WRECKED AMERICAN POWER, by Fred Kaplan: Of course, even if America's consumerist culture is unsustainable, the Bush Administration has certainly helped hasten the country's decline. Kaplan, Slate's excellent military affairs columnist, epicts a Bush Administration filled with the most dangerous kind of dumb -- the kind that thinks it is smarter than everybody else, and that the rules of history somehow don't apply in the here and now.

His conclusion is devastating: "Bush and his aides and enablers set forth a new way of fighting battles -- but withheld the tools for winning wars. They aimed to topple rogue regimes -- with scant knowledge of the local culture and no plan for what to do after the tyrant fell. They dreamed of spreading democracy around the world -- but did nothing to help build the democratic institutions, without which mere elections were moot or worse. In their best-intentioned moments, they put forth ideas without strategies, policies without process, wishes without means."

TOWING JEHOVAH, by James Morrow: And coming back full circle to matters of faith is this decade-old novel about the death of God, and the Captain Joseph Hazelwoodish oil tanker captain sent to tow God's two-mile long body across the oceans to its final resting place in the Arctic. It's mix of satire and detailed observations about sailing place the book somewhere on the spectrum between Moby Dick and Slaughterhouse Five. Plus, there's plenty here to offend both the earnestly faithful and the earnestly secular. A good time was had by all.

I've been meaning to share this piece of art for a while, considering the subject matter. My wife painted this piece, called "Four O'Clock" for a themed show in Corona, Calif., in August called "Five for Five Jive" — in which the artists needed to incorporate five elements: a monkey, a lemon, a tree, a woman and a clock.

Mrs. Zauis sold this painting yesterday at Viva Gallery in Sherman Oaks, Calif. We're thrilled, of course. But I'm a bit sad, because I enjoyed having this piece in the house. Always made me smile ... and think of Infinite Monkeys.

VIVA MONKEYS!

Mrs. Zaius informed me, just before I hit "publish," that she has another monkey-themed piece that is well-along, but as of yet unfinished. Happy day!

In a way, this Monkey's Gone to Heaven.

Charlie Don't Surf: Sam Bottoms (left) was Lance B. Johnson, among other roles.
Oh, this is sad news: Sam Bottoms, best known as Lance from Apocalypse Now, had died of brain cancer. He was 53. Dirty Harry remarks: "Maybe there’s some reason, but I could never figure out why Sam Bottoms wasn’t in more films. He brought a warmth and gentle spirit to every frame we were lucky enough to see him in. Whenever you’re casting, no matter how small the part, you want actors able to automatically connect in some way. Sam Bottoms did that just standing there."

Sam Bottoms (left) was Lance B. Johnson, among other roles.

Via Christian Toto comes the trailer for X-Men Origins: Wolverine. God I hope that doesn't mean that we're in for X-Men Origins: Storm ... but if we are, I wonder if Halle Berry will go back to the ridiculous African accent, or just bag it — like she so hilariously did about a quarter of the way through the first flim.

Good sign: The always interesting Liev Schreiber as Sabertooth, an improvement over the last, more cartoonish one. The new, fleshed-out character is probably beyond the range of the original movie Sabertooth, the appropriately named Tyler Mane.

Bad sign: Brian Cox was not retained as William Stryker. Probably a mistake.

I'm also a little worried about what director Gavin Hood can come up with, considering his thin resume. I'd feel better with Bryan Singer back at the controls.

Regardless, here's the trailer. The movie looks dark, brooding and angry — right up my alley. I'm sure Ben and I will make another "date" to see this in May 2009.

Monkey friend, Christian Toto, had an interesting interview on the Dennis Miller Show. Just thought I'd share. Have a listen.

Click to play
7.97 MB

I freaked out when the L.A. Times said Clint Eastwood was a vegan. Turns out that was just outrageous liberal media lying again. Today, the New York Times sets the record straight:

He arrived for the interview at the Mission Ranch restaurant here as if he owned the place, and it didn’t make any difference that, in this case, he does. He had his first legal drink in the bar while he was stationed at the nearby Army base in the late 1940s. In 1986 he bought the property and rebuilt it to his taste, with a piano bar, heart-stopping views of the ocean spray on Point Lobos and plenty of meat on the menu. Despite what you might have read on Wikipedia, Mr. Eastwood is not a vegan, and he looked slightly aghast when told exactly what a vegan is. “I never look at the Internet for just that reason,” he said.

I would not want to be the person who started that rumor. No doubt Eastwood would relish the irony of field-dressing and grilling a vegan.

A favorite hang-out pastime of the Zaius clan is to play the "DJ game." We often play using iTunes, and we pick two songs in a row. The rule: Neither Mrs. Zaius nor I can pick a song that's been played on our iTunes in the last 30 days. It's great for mixing things up and re-discovering long-lost songs.

We've taken to shaking things up and thinking of a long-lost song and grabbing the video off YouTube, if it's available. Anyway, I thought it would be fun if we played that game here on Infinite Monkeys. I'll start (though, I kinda started below with Golden Earring).

The idea is to be organic. If a song makes you think of another song, you go with that. If you had something in mind, go with that. It's harder when it's not organic, but might still be cool. This is an experiment. Post your submissions in the comments.

Mrs. Zaius is going to start us off with her picks. She's feelin' an 80s Brit movement coming on. So here's some English Beat ...

... and The Clash doing "Radio Clash" in an appearance on Tom Snyder's Tomorrow Show in 1981. And Wikipedia says that The Clash's first public performance of this song is the what you see below, on Tom Snyder's show. So this is ultimate vintage.

Monkeys, monkey fans, trolls ... the floor is yours. The only rule: Be cool, or be campy ... but be spontaneous and be yourself. Oh, and make an effort to consume other people's videos.

... if it's an old-school rock party. Golden Earring, the best thing ever to come out of The Hague, really rocked it bizzarro in 1982 with "Twilight Zone." Hearing it even now, it's still hard to believe that the musicians and the singer are not American, but from The Netherlands. And it's also one of the most confusing songs that was ever played a ton, with lyrics still in dispute.

Behold, the greatest Dutch rock song of all time! I eagerly await the justified re-embracing of this great song in our culture. Some movie maven has got to put this in a soundtrack.

WARNING: This is the European version, so there is about 3 brief seconds of female topless nudity. Oh, and a creepy little girl staring into the camera. And women dancing in short-cropped cat-suits. And scenes of (implied) torture ... Joel ... LOOK AWAY!! LOOK AWAY!! ;-)

Man! I forgot how cool that video is. If I ever get shot, I want to fall on a comfy bed, too.

Miss Bettie PageThe queen of pin-ups is dead. Bettie Page died Thursday in Los Angeles after suffering a massive heart attack nine days earlier. She was 85.

According to the International Herald Tribune:

Page, whose popularity underwent a cult-like revival in the last 20 years, had been hospitalized for three weeks with pneumonia and was about to be released Dec. 2 when she suffered a heart attack, said Roesler, of CMG Worldwide. She was transferred in a coma to Kindred Hospital, where she died.

In her trademark raven bangs, spike heels and killer curves, Page was the most famous pinup girl of the post-World War II era, a centerfold on a million locker doors and garage walls. She was also a major influence in the fashion industry and a target of Senator Estes Kefauver's anti-pornography investigators.

But in 1957, at the height of her fame, she disappeared, and for three decades her private life — two failed marriages, a fight against poverty and mental illness, resurrection as a born-again Christian, years of seclusion in Southern California — was a mystery to all but a few close friends.

Then in the late 1980s and early '90s, she was rediscovered and a Bettie Page renaissance began. David Stevens, creator of the comic-book and later movie character the Rocketeer, immortalized her as the Rocketeer's girlfriend. Fashion designers revived her look. Uma Thurman, in bangs, reincarnated Bettie in Quentin Tarantino's "Pulp Fiction," and Demi Moore, Madonna and others appeared in Page-like photos.

Bettie and the Rocketeer
The obits say Page helped fuel the sexual revolution of the 1960s and '70s. I suppose that's true. I think it would be a mistake to downplay the rest of her story -- particularly her conversion to Christianity and her reclusiveness. She had trouble accepting her latter-day fame. I was one among who knows how many teenage boys who ogled Page's pics years ago. (Fact is, because I was a comic book geek, I knew Bettie Page first from Dave Stevens before I saw any of her actual pin-ups.) I hope she found what she was looking for.

Check out Bettie Page's official website for a memorial tribute. (Not necessarily safe for work.) Geek Tyrant reminisces. And here is the L.A. Times obit.

Mrs. Zaius and I were playing the "YouTube Music Game" tonight, which is a variation of the "iTunes game" — where we try to pick cool, often-unplayed songs for fun and the "ahhhh, I remember that" factor. Well ... after many windy roads, we came upon The Traveling Wilburys.

What a treasure it was that The Traveling Wilburys got together to re-introduce the greatness of Roy Orbison to another generation. And it's, frankly, heart-rending to hear George Harrison play some great music for his friends near the end of his life.

Enjoy ... a two-fer, the second video with a loving "almost-empty rocking chair" tribute to the then-deceased Orbison.

The Wilburys are right ... "It's alllllll right."

The American Culture was kind enough to expound on my extended remarks in an earlier Monkey Post on Sam Karnick's original post on the Colbert Christmas Special.

Mr. Karnick takes it a little further, especially in reacting to a review of the special by conservative heavyweight L. Brent Bozell III, which Karnick doesn't think too much of (and I mean the review, not of Bozell in general).

And, providing an alternative point of view and proving once again that conservatives just don't understand or appreciate popular culture, here's a denunciation of A Colbert Christmas by L. Brent Bozell III, in which he questions the sincerity of Colbert's religious convictions.

Ouch. It's worth reading all of Karnick's post.

I know cross-post my response to Karnick's update, for your reading pleasure:

Bozell is really showing his humorless kill-joy instincts in this one. He spends quite a bit of time going over Toby Keith's contribution to the special.

Now, Bozell either thinks the famously conservative Keith is a moron easily duped or ... is some kind of phony conservative. For Pete's sake, man! Keith's most famous song tells terrorists that they are going to get a boot in their ass, courtesy of the Red, White and Blue. Could it be that Keith is man enough to poke fun at his own right-wing macho persona -- while at the same time having a little fun about how he dislikes what liberals and the ACLU have done to this country? It's a comedy show, Brent. I trust Keith's instincts on this one, and find no offense.

As for that closing number with Colbert and Costello, I'm still very touched by it and in awe that it made it on national television. I think Colbert left a little bit of ambiguity in how his lyrics could be interpreted on purpose -- all the better to sneak them past the clever people who work at Comedy Central.

Yes, one can take them as an insult to Christianity, as Bozell does. And that kind of reaction gives Colbert lots of cover — as does his use of the generic term "Christmas Spirit." I believe Colbert uses the term "Christmas Spirit" as a Trojan horse for his larger message of Christian love that is the real meaning of Christmas. It's a religious message in a secular cloak.

One part of the video that got the attention of Mrs. Zaius and I was when Costello sang "A redeemer, and a savior ... ." At that moment, Colbert nods his head and points his finger toward Costello. It's a subtle indication of what Colbert's intentions were with this little number.

If Bozell wants a fully Christian Christmas special, he'd do better to turn on one of the many Christian channels on cable. For a mainstream pop-culture outlet, though, it doesn't get much more Christian than what Colbert produced.

Thoughts, friends?

... that's a great idea.

Does Hollywood really think that they are immune from the economic hurt/boycott when it so openly mocks its audience, even in today's tough times?

I'm almost loath to post this little anti-Prop. 8 video, but, here it is. Hollywood liberals lecturing, tossing out insults, expressing their own brand of (culturally accepted) bigotry, and yes ... providing theological explanation ... in song.

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

From the Funny or Die website, again.

Meh.

John C. Reilly sings about what happened on Election Day: "Look nobody's watching ..."

Really? I remember seeing an ad or two on TV here in California about this issue before the vote. What I also remember was a single state judge redefining marriage out of the blue. You know. When — in reality — no one was watching. And is it the fault of Christians that you guys didn't think of such a clever way to express your point of view before Election Day? C'mon.

Hey, Hollywood B-listers (mostly). Do you know who really has a problem with this issue, and is deadly serious about it? Hint: they don't pray to Jesus. And they enjoy stoning women, too. How about showing some real courage, huh?

By the way, where's the mockery of Elton John, the most famously gay Briton in history? He would seem ripe for this kind of treatment — perhaps more so, since he's a "traitor." That's right, Sir Elton is a supporter of the traditional definition of marriage, and thinks the opponents are going down the wrong track:

In December 2005, John and Furnish tied the knot in a civil partnership ceremony in Windsor, England. But, clarified the singer, "We're not married. Let's get that right. We have a civil partnership. What is wrong with Proposition 8 is that they went for marriage. Marriage is going to put a lot of people off, the word marriage."

John and Furnish, and their two cocker spaniels, Marilyn and Arthur, were in town for Tuesday's annual benefit for the Elton John AIDS Foundation.

"I don't want to be married. I'm very happy with a civil partnership. If gay people want to get married, or get together, they should have a civil partnership," John says. "The word 'marriage,' I think, puts a lot of people off.

"You get the same equal rights that we do when we have a civil partnership. Heterosexual people get married. We can have civil partnerships."

Elton John as a voice of reason. Who'd have thunk it?

My friend Sam Karnick at The American Culture highlighted Steven Colbert's Christmas Special on Comedy Central, which aired just a few days ago and is now out on DVD. In the comment section, Karnick has a pretty good back and forth with a commenter on theism, nihilism, atheism, and other big subjects. Yes, this clip from Colbert's special prompted such a deep discussion.

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

A Colbert Christmas: Colbert/Costello Duet

Colbert at Christmas
Colbert Christmas DVD

Green Screen
Bill O'Reilly Interview

I share the comment I left on Karnick's site (as of this moment, awaiting publication):

I dare to call this a remarkable event in modern popular culture. Modern comedy, especially on Comedy Central, drips with cynicism. The network's biggest shows — South Park, The Daily Show, The Sarah Silverman Program and (perhaps to a lesser extent) the Colbert Report — take potshots at everything traditional in America. I find a good bit of that funny, but start to get tired of it after extended exposure. It's always been a mystery to me how a network that makes its bones by continually mocking (often in bad faith) the values of Middle America thrives. Perhaps the majority of America — the non-elites — are not as stupid as Jon Stewart seems to think we are, and we have the self-confidence to laugh at ourselves.

Yet, on Comedy Central no less, Colbert presents a little song that is sincere, respectful, honest and (gasp!) wholesome. Note that Colbert produced a "Christmas" special, not a "Holiday" special. The distinction is important, especially in today's climate.

Where else, except the classic Peanuts Christmas Special, does one hear any explicit and respectful reference to the Christian meaning of Christmas in mainstream culture? Imagine for a moment that the Peanuts special didn't already exist. Is there any chance that someone in Hollywood today would produce it — and it would be eagerly broadcast by a major American network? I think not. We'd end up with some bland "Sparkle Season Spectacular" devoid of any meaning. Ugh.

Also note, the first lines of the song take a swing at the "cynics" — the bread and butter of the Comedy Central audience. Yes, Costello's second lyric mentions Santa, but he first mentions (and honors) "believers," for whom Christmas is sacred and not just an excuse to buy stuff. And Costello sings later of many a "Christmas carol to be sung." That's quite a remarkable thing to hear — and I believe it was intended to poke at the bland "Happy Holidays" nonsense that has infected the modern Western obsession with multiculturalism. This is not a song that tries to hide that it's Christmas, nor apologize for it, but celebrates it.

Now, to get back into the weeds here, I come down on Mr. Karnick's side. It's hard to listen to that song and not think that there is at least a gentle indictment of those "who believe in nothin'." And Christians waiting for "judgment" from the Lord are of a bit more peaceful character than those engaged in jihad.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

And now, the WKRP Turkey Drop clip:

Update: The full ep is on Hulu.

Oh, this is very cool. He makes it look so effortless. My sensei calls nunchucks "senseis on a stick," because the weapon is so unforgiving. The beginner's bruises from elbow to wrist are evidence of that. Trust me, I know. (Via John Derbyshire at The Corner.)

I've never heard of Carolyn Chute until this week's New York Times Book Review. But I want to run out and buy her novel -- or, at least, ask for it as a Christmas present -- based purely on the author photo that runs with the review.

I believe that's an AK-47 in her right hand. Turns out Chute -- oh, so Dickensian a name, no? -- is a militia member who has written a sympathetic novel about militia members. And it's apparently quite good.

And I thought I'd post this, because the picture alone would give Ben and Zaius a thrill.

Dirty Harry hips us to Paste Magazine's list of the Top 40 TV theme songs of all time. Let's just be blunt: Paste Magazine has some things to answer for. Not a bad list, for sure. It's just not quite right.

After perusing the list, here is Dr. Zaius' Top 5:

No. 1 (No. 3 on Paste's list): Sanford & Son: This is the best TV theme song of all time. So funky. Soooooo fuuuuunnkkkky! Nice job, Quincy Jones. It has a special place in the family's heart because Mrs. Z and I would sing the song to our 19-year-old cat. Murphy, by those days, grumbled and quacked. Did not meow. Hard not to think of Fred Sanford when looking at Old Murph, God bless his soul. Every time he walked by, one of us would sing: Waah Na Waa Na! Waah Na Waa Na Waahna Waah! ...

No. 2 (No. 8 on Paste's list) Hawaii Five-O: A respectable showing, I guess. It's Top 10. Don't know how it's not Top 3, though, or even No. 1. Morton Stevens' composition is not only catchy, it's complex. A thing of driving beauty.

No. 3 (No. 12 on Paste's list) Mission Impossible: C'mon. How is this not in the Top 10, or Top 5. Seriously. It's iconic, and still awesome 30 years later. Gets your blood movin'. Before there was Jack Bauer and CTU, there was Peter Graves, and Martin Landau, and some black guy ... and ... a fuse dangerously moving across the screen! And the theme song and credits take a full 2:32 to finish. That will never happen in television again, but the song was worth playing all the way through.

No. 4 (No. 1 on Paste's list) Cheers: Hard to argue with this being in the Top 5 All Time. Who can't relate to this song? It's really helped by the montage of old photos and paintings of more than a century of people finding comfort in going to a place "where everyone knows your name." We all have a place like that. Mine is a place called J. Brian's in Fredericksburg, Virginia.

No. 5 (Unlisted by Paste) CHiPs: This is listed because Paste made a glaring omission. This disco-themed classic doesn't warrant even an honorable mention? Please. If you are now between the ages of 35 and 40 and didn't ride around on your bike as a kid with a buddy and pretend to be Ponch and John, you were a loser. There. I said it. Deal. Same goes for pretending to be the Duke Boys. CHiPs made the drudgery of pulling over drunk drivers and catching speeders look cool. By the way, the Dallas theme and the Charlie's Angels theme are two other keepers that should have been on Paste's list. (Side note: My wife's brother held a tape recorder next to the TV when the song came on so he could have it to play and be inspired to greatness any time he wanted. And, let me interject ... No. You're a dork!).

Some other notes:

Welcome Back Kotter. Should be higher than just No. 29, but perhaps that's just my New York-born bias seeping in.

Barney Miller. That funky bass line deserves Top 20 treatment, not relegated to No. 27

Laverne & Shirley ... "never heard the word, impossible." A fave of Mrs. Z, comes in on No. 25 on Paste.

The Simpsons. Way too good to be only No. 20. I played percussion in my college's marching, symphonic and basketball pep bands. The director thought it would be a great thing to get hip with the kids and put The Simpson's theme in our repertoire. Yeah. It took dozens of very talented musicians a month to play it with a semblance of competence in front of a crowd. Elfman's composition is manicially sick!

Star Trek: The Next Generation is No. 14. I think a bit high, since it's derivative of the original theme. The Muppet Show, slightly below ST:TNG, is better.

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air at No. 11? An atrocity. It's a barely new riff of Smith's "Parents Just Don't Understand" pop-rap hit. And ... oh ... it sucks.

No. 10: John Williams' NBC Olympic Fanfare. A great composition. Beautiful. Not a "theme song" per se. Should not be on the list, no matter how much mileage NBC has gotten out of it.

Little House on the Prairie, though it went from a discoesque original theme to something more ... settler ... was good in both versions.

The Hollywood writers strike robbed us of an entire season of "24," but the long wait for the return of Jack Bauer is almost over. "24: Redemption" airs on Fox this Sunday. Don't forget to set your TiVos, because the reviews are coming in and it looks like Jack fans will not be disappointed. I especially like this bit of classic Jack-spits-in-the-face-of-the-Kumbaya-crowd dialogue.

Redemption ... is a taut, exciting, emotionally impacting two hours, packed full of iconic Bauer moments–my favorite, when he’s talking trash to the useless UN worker and says “Why don’t you go hide in the shelter with the rest of the children.”

Heh. Worth seeing for that scene alone, I say.

(HT: Dirty Harry)

The new Star Trek movie trailer is out. It's being shown before the new Bond movie, and someone was kind enough to bootleg it and post it on the Web. It looks pretty damn cool. We can only hope the script is worthy of the visuals, and the Star Trek brand. And let's also hope there's lots and lots of Zachary Quinto as Spock — whom I've always found more interesting than Kirk.

Now, if we can get a sequel with the young KAAAAAHHHHHHNNNNNNN!!!!!! ... then we're on our way.

Thanks to Ed Driscoll, Dirty Harry and Toto for the links. We are honored and welcome those fine readers to our little, poo-stained corner of the blogosphere. Have a look around.

UPDATE 11/18: I've replaced the bootleg version with the official version, which has better picture quality and enjoys the added benefit of not being a take-down target of Paramount Pictures.

Needless to say, General Zod is not pleased.

I admit that the list is a little on the downbeat side. Yeah, it might be a little on the cynical side (okay, maybe a lot). Fine. Arrest me. There are some gems here, I think. (The Jarvis Cocker song is relevant no matter who wins.) And only a few appear on National Review's top 50 conservative rock songs of all time. Then again, this isn't an exclusively rock list.

As with the Halloween list, this one is 100 songs long and as much a provocation as anything. I've added lyrical snippets. Feel free to add others/alternates in the comments.

To all my monkey friends in California:

I have cast my vote in the hotly contested state of Pennsylvania, where people will be carefully watching the results. It's fun to live in a swing state. I feel sorry for those of you on your way to cast your votes for John McCain in California, knowing there's no way in heck he's actually going to win a single electoral vote there.

Democracy is fun! I hope you get to experience it someday!

Joel

Gotta hand it to The Maverick. If he's gonna go down, he's gonna go down laughing. This is can't miss TV from SNL the Saturday night before the election (with an appearance by Cindy McCain!).

The perfect Halloween tune, although I always understood that it was the Devil playing the violin.

Below is my 100-song Halloween playlist for 2008. (Click read more below the row of icons on this post)

All right, I was willing to forgive Obama his liberal elitism, but this is simply beyond the pale:

"That ain't right," Obama said. "Can you imagine? If Social Security funds had been invested in the stock market, Americans wouldn't even need Social Security!

"You would be having Sanford and Son," the senator said, referring to the 70s sitcom featuring Redd Foxx as the proprietor of a junkyard.

"I'm comin', Weezie," he said, laughing, botching one of the signature lines from the show, in which Foxx clutched his chest in a mock heart-attack and prepared to meet his late wife in heaven.

I ask you: is America ready for a President who doesn't know his Weezie from his Lizbeth?

I think not.