Are head injuries the reason Ben Roethlisberger is such a colossal jerk?

That's the theory floated by Sports Illustrated writer David Epstein, in an interview with neuropsychologist Dr. Jordan Grafman -- Roethlisberger, after all, has suffered four concussions on the football field during his NFL career.

According to Grafman, two particular behaviors are endemic to people with moderate or severe frontal lobe injury, or to people with more mild but repetitive injury: 1) violating social rules by saying inappropriate things, and 2) saying appropriate or typical things in an inappropriate context.

"If you're married and you're flirting with another woman in an elevator with your wife next to you," Grafman says, "that's the kind of clearly inappropriate behavior." Roethlisberger is not married, but one man told me that Roethlisberger had asked out his wife while the man was present.

Granted, as Grafman notes, "we all say inappropriate things sometimes," but "it's the frequency with which it happens, and the unawareness. When you have a frontal lobe injury in particular, you often become unaware of your inappropriate behaviors. The observations usually come from wives or children." A typical situation in my reporting last week was something like this: I would hear that Roethlisberger had, for example, said inappropriate things to waitresses at a restaurant or walked out on a bill, so I would call the establishment. "I don't know if he walked out on a tab here," would be a typical response from whoever picked up the phone, "but he was really rude to my friend after he invited her over to his table." Tales of indecorous acts abounded.

Or it's possible that Roethlisberger is, you know, a colossal jerk. He wouldn't be the first multimillionaire athlete with dangerous delusions of entitlement, would he? Didn't we all kind of hate the jocks in high school?

And yet: If Epstein's onto something here, the morality of the NFL itself gets trickier and trickier to defend. There's already substantial evidence that playing professional football destroys the bodies and minds of the men who play it. If also it transforms them into moral monsters -- as a natural, organic byproduct of the game -- how could you possibly watch another game in good conscience? What redeeming value is left?

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Dr. Zaius...

I remembered only after posting this that Jim Lakely is a Steelers fan.

I really wasn't trying to tweak you this time, Jim. I swear.

Counter examples

There are a lot.... Kurt Warner, Brett Farve, etc.

Roethlisberrgerur

(a) I wish he would change his name
(b) I am confident any such brain injury is so rare as to be fascinating -- see Roethlisberger, above. Changing NFL policy on that basis would be inadvisable. Boxing would as soon change before football would. Although I am a fan of leather pads and thin helmets, myself. Make it more like rugby, and watch those 350-pound goons get in better shape to further their careers. No helmet-to-helmet contact as a primary weapon, etc.
(c) There are cases where brain injury has changed a man's behavior. The late Dr. Mrs. Wry Mouth (late because she married me, not because she has passed on) would aver that frontal-lobe damage could short out a person's impulse control.

YOU STUPID ASSHOLES

LOL

"YOU STUPID ASSHOLES"

And that, children, is how you nail the punchline.

Re: Roethlesbergerur

Wry sez:

I am confident any such brain injury is so rare as to be fascinating -- see Roethlisberger, above. Changing NFL policy on that basis would be inadvisable.

From the New Yorker story linked to above:

In the meantime, late last month the University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research released the findings of an N.F.L.-funded phone survey of just over a thousand randomly selected retired N.F.L. players—all of whom had played in the league for at least three seasons. Self-reported studies are notoriously unreliable instruments, but, even so, the results were alarming. Of those players who were older than fifty, 6.1 per cent reported that they had received a diagnosis of “dementia, Alzheimer’s disease, or other memory-related disease.” That’s five times higher than the national average for that age group. For players between the ages of thirty and forty-nine, the reported rate was nineteen times the national average. (The N.F.L. has distributed five million dollars to former players with dementia.)

I'm afraid there's a growing body of evidence that repeated brain trauma is pretty much an inevitable result of an NFL playing career of any length.

NFL: Exploratory Study leads to More Subtly Designed Study

I'd write a study, based on results like those. Still, though -- the "damaged impulse control" form of brain damage is, I think, rare.

And speaking of NFL morality

Let's not forget that violent ground acquisition games such as football are in fact a crypto-fascist metaphor for nuclear war.

Re: Nuclear War

a crypto-fascist metaphor for nuclear war

Which, as we also know, is a motherf***er.

(Doncha know.)

Re: Nuclear War

That joke is ALSO funny every time.

Besides: Whatchoo gonna do without that ass?

Re: NFL Morality

That joke is funny each and every time you make it.

Re: Re: NFL Morality

I try not to use it more than once or twice a year.

IQ Test

Maybe we should look on playing in the NFL as something of a test of intelligence. If you're dumb enough to keep playing, you're dumb enough so humanity won't be damaged when your brain stops working. They can hand out the Darwin Award with the Heisman Trophy.

My father played semi-pro football for a little while. He quit because he was tired of getting his ass kicked. This was a guy who, for fun, used to jump out of second- and third-story windows with his gang member friends. If even he could figure out football was a bad road, anyone can.

Has anyone done studies on head injuries in soccer or rugby? I'd be curious to see if American football is really that much worse.